No Smoking!

It has now been about 60 hours since I last smoked a cigarette. I have been working on quitting for about a year or longer now. I always had some excuse or another for not managing to actually quit, either I was too stressed, or it was too hard to just up and quit. I tried getting on those meds to quit smoking but my insurance wouldn't pay for them. Since I've moved I have been a lot less stressed not to mention it costs almost double for a pack of cigs here than what I was paying. I was steadily cutting back, going from a pack or more a day to a half a pack to about 5 a day. Then I'd suddenly start smoking more again and would have to work my way back down again. It was frustrating for me and for my family and I began to doubt that I had the willpower to quit at all. Then one morning, Friday morning, I stopped at the store to get gas, drink, and cigs before work. I had already smoked one that morning, and I had two left in my pack. I pumped gas, went inside for my drink, paid for drink and fuel and left. As I pull out of the parking lot I remember that I was going to buy cigs, oh well, I say to myself, I can get them later. At work, I have lots of calls to make for my manager so I forgot to go take a 'morning' smoke break. At lunch I smoke some, then I smoke half a cig that afternoon for break. As I am leaving the parking lot and heading home for the night I smoke the last half of cigarette thinking to myself, I really shouldn't buy any more, I can do this, I can quit! And even though it's been only 60 hours, it has seemed a lot longer. The struggle is not over yet I fear, but I am doing better already.

Ayvea